Write it DOWN!

Today while pilfering through the brilliance that is my twitter feed I noticed a video posted by Tom Price (@pricetom, PC Andy Torchwood).  The video was a commencement speech by my personal writing god Aaron Sorkin to the 2012 class of his Alma Mater (you can watch his magnificent brilliance here: https://ensemble.syr.edu/app/sites/index.aspx?destinationID=izHGVJ2he0iJAF4dHctW-Q&contentID=qp_sG09FV0-H77OwyXCDwQ ) Besides the usual feeling of personal hackiness that comes with observing any form of Aaron's writing it also (as per usual) inspired an idea of my own (that's writer's code for I stole this): If I were to address the graduating class of my own Alma Mater Oglethorpe University what advice would I bestow upon them? I thought back to my favorite sum-the-meaning-of-life-into-15-minutes-including-a-few-touching-and-witty-personal-anecdotes-speech moments, including another commencement address by JK Rowling, the "Wear Sunscreen" thing and The Last Lecture (go ahead and google, I'll wait for ya) my fantastically useful and magical words of wisdom are these-write it down.  Why is it that the so called secrets of the world's successful people are always so simple and common sense (i.e. anything from Poor Richards Almanac) yet so incredibly elusive? Oh, that's right we didn't WRITE IT DOWN! During my tenure among the hallowed halls of OU I learned many things about myself including the fact that writing things down committed them to memory.  At the time I used this "trick" to avoid studying, at which I was fairly dreadful.  The slight flaw with this brilliant plan is that it required one to actually go to class, to hear the things worthy of inspiration (read:stealing) spoken by my fantastic professors.  Here it is a little more than 9 years to the day from my own commencement and I finally figured this amazing idea that I already knew out.  Some learning curve, eh?

I had a job interview today and I didn't write some of the important information down.  Due to some mitigating circumstances I didn't sleep at all last night so my memory wasn't quite as clear as it usually is and the missing information caused an argument amongst my family members (that is a whole other blog post, trust me) which set in motion a group of events which might or might not have cost me the job, won't know until later in the week.  After the interview I was asked several questions by my family and the ones where I had written down the answers somewhere caused relief to my already stressed to the max clan whereas the ones which I couldn't produce physical proof of led to more arguing. 

So in closing write it down, take note, keep important information handy-whatever expression you prefer-do that and do it often and you will be guaranteed success or at least fewer stressful moments which can only lead to good things.  Never take for granted that someone else will have the information for you.  Tomorrow we'll tackle the whole issue of finding that information we have written down.

So...yeah

My life always seems to be the same story over and over again: stagnation and restlessness.  Up until yesterday the stagnation was quite literal since I was recovering from a type of ankle fracture that requires staying off the injured leg for weeks and even months so just getting out of my tiny hobbit hole was nigh impossible.  Per my surgeon I am now officially mobile and can even take my boot off sometimes, both of which come with an incredible sense of freedom.  I'm still unable to do my job at Cracker Barrel (which, quite frankly I considered to be my former job the moment my ankle snapped).  Of course if I still am without a proper job in a few weeks I will have to try and go back but I am doing everything I can to keep that from happening.  I have a very promising lead on a job as I submitted my resume to HR without any advertised opening and a few weeks later they contacted me for an interview that went very well.  The very fact that they sought me out is a very good sign.  The job is at a plasma donation center and since they pay people for donations and you can donate as often as twice a week they are very busy these days.  The salary is lower than say being a phlebotomist in a hospital because the ease of the job (i.e. no kids, only willing healthy patients) but I will either get a raise eventually or have garnered enough experience to pay for a higher paying position.  I'm at that cautiously optimistic stage where I have faith but no expectation based on my experience of the past, I don't know two YEARS.  Keeping everything crossed until I find out one way or another.

I'm just so tired of waiting, and being frustrated about waiting, and complaining about being tired of waiting.  I have so many things I need to do but I need money to do all of them.  I should probably start donating plasma. I would literally make more money donating plasma twice a week than I did at Cracker Barrel.  I don't have the best veins so I'm not sure if I would even be a good donor but it's gotta be worth a try.  I just need to feel as if I'm doing something, making progress.  I literally feel as if my brain is incapable of creating endorphins.  Do you know what it's like to not feel anything like happiness or joy for months?  I hope you never do because it makes everything, even breathing sometimes feel so difficult you wouldn't mind if you just died.  Not suicidal just tired of feeling like that.

One of the things I should be doing is writing.  I mean, I am a writer and that's what writers do to deal with tough situations-you write.  Unfortunately, this kind of depression makes pleasurable activities painful and difficult.  That's the thing about writing-it's impossible to do it without examining your own life and emotions.  Some days, you just don't want to know that much about yourself.  The other thing about writing, however is that you can lose yourself in it.  You can control it when everything else in your life seems out of control.  I am better today than I was two days ago and next week? Next month? Who knows what wonderful things are around the corner?